Harsh words, but often proved true.

They may be amiable, loyal, forgiving, ready to defend our domains against all threats - but, well, they still aren't the brightest creatures on the planet.

Regardless of our reprimands, they still obsess over other dogs' excrement, eat and roll in horse manure and rotting carcasses, quake at the sound of thunder, drink out of toilets, eat garbage and then throw up, and perform demeaning pet tricks for measly Milkbones.

Their cheerful personality has everything to do with their being blissfully ignorant, which explains why we're so drawn to them.

They do all sorts of stupid things and yet never get embarrassed or feel ashamed.

We should be so lucky.

And, the fact is, dogs are an awful lot like people.

This book takes an irreverent look at dogs' behavior and at the often ridiculous conduct of their owners.

From Fido being dressed up in baby clothes, having his own birthday cake or being carried on a "walk," to dogs incessantly smelling each others' behinds, barking at squirrels they can't reach, or running away from a tom cat, Bill Buckley photographs and comments on them all.

The book surmises that dogs can't seem to stop repeating the same behavior that brings them nothing but trouble, while their owners have no such excuse.

Despite dogs' simple-mindedness, however, this book is still a tribute to man's best friend, if a bit underhanded.